For most gays in Europe, the 'mecca' of choice is undoubtedly Gran Canaria. It cannot be called pretty, not in any way, but it is warm and friendly and homophobia hardly exists, in my experience. Personally I also like Puerto de la Cruz in Tenerife - a lot quieter in the gay sense, but more picturesque and one can certainly eat a lot better. I haven't been to Key West in quite a few years, but it is good if the 7 hour flight and the drive down from Miami doesn't put you off. When I lived in the Far East the obvious place to go was Patong in Phuket, recently badly affected by the tidal waves in the Indian Ocean; I only went once to Pattaya and must say it was way too seedy for my taste, although I hear they have tried to go more upmarket in recent years.
If you are going to Gran Canaria, though, it's best to avoid seeing the Yumbo in daylight, if your aesthetic sensibilities are easily affected. But then, most self-respecting gay travellers aren't likely to commit such a faux pas, are they?